Beyond Belief: the Coercive Power of High Control Religions
I feel that a lot of times when people think about high-control religions or cults they think about Charles Manson or Jim Jones, they don’t often consider some of the more mainstream religions currently active in the world today. There can be a perception that people who are in these religions have made an informed decision about their commitment to the religion and that they can leave with little or no consequences. Unfortunately, this is not always the case.
High-control religions, often referred to as cults or authoritarian groups, are faith communities that exert extensive control over their members' lives. These groups are characterised by a rigid structure that demands obedience, discourages questioning, and often requires members to conform to a strict set of beliefs and practices. Recognising if one is in a high-control religious group involves being aware of certain patterns and behaviours that are common in such groups.
What Does a High Control Religion Look Like?
There are many characteristics which are common among high-control religious groups. While some of the examples may seem innocuous on their own, when you look at the bigger picture it becomes clear how the tactics can be used to manipulate people into not only committing to the religion but staying committed.
Targeting vulnerable people: These groups often target individuals who are going through a stressful period, are emotionally vulnerable, have weak family connections, or are experiencing socioeconomic hardships. New college students, for example, are prime targets as they are still forming their identities and have recently been separated from their families.
Love-Bombing: This technique involves showering new recruits with affection, flattery, and validation to make them feel special and unique. It's a way to quickly establish a bond and create a sense of belonging.
Isolation: By discouraging relationships outside the group, high-control religions create an environment where their influence is unchallenged. Members may be encouraged to cut ties with family and friends who are not part of the group.
Fear and Guilt: Members are often controlled through fear of eternal punishment or social ostracism. They may be made to feel guilty for not adhering strictly to the group's doctrines or for even considering leaving.
Control of Information: Access to external sources of information is restricted, which prevents members from encountering critical perspectives or alternative viewpoints. This can include limiting access to media, the internet, or any material that is not group-approved.
Coercive Control: A pattern of assault, threats, humiliation, and intimidation may be used to harm, punish, or frighten members into compliance. This psychological manipulation is a key part of the control exerted by these groups.
Exploitation of Triggering Events: Individuals who have experienced a traumatic event such as a divorce, the death of a loved one, or any other significant life change may be particularly targeted for recruitment as they may be seeking meaning, belonging, and control.
These tactics can be very effective, especially when combined and used systematically. They exploit basic human needs for connection, meaning, and security, making it challenging for individuals to resist or leave the group.
How Can You Recognise if You Are in A High Control Religion?
Often a high-control religion will use some or all of the above tactics to manipulate and control its members. They create a strong emotional bond which makes it more difficult for individuals to question the group’s beliefs or leave the community. It's important for individuals to be aware of these tactics and to approach any group with healthy scepticism, especially if they notice signs of coercive control or manipulation.
Some questions to ask yourself would be:
Can I make decisions about my behaviour? Does being a member involve following strict rules governing personal behaviour like what you eat, or wear? Does it dictate relationships or sexual orientation? Are you obligated to follow certain routines or meetings (where non-compliance would be discouraged or have consequences)?
Is there control over information? Are you discouraged from reading up on the history of the organisation, or addressing concerns or criticisms? Do they make truth claims which are only backed up by their own sources, or by external sources taken out of context? Are you discouraged from having discussions or meaningful relationships with those outside of the religion?
Does the organisation discourage critical thinking and encourage black-and-white thinking? Do they claim to have the only real truth about life/afterlife or biblical teachings or revelations? Are doubts about the group's teachings or doctrine discouraged or punished (either socially or through membership restrictions)
Do you feel guilty or fearful about having thoughts or feelings that are not approved by the group?
Does the leadership invoke thought-stopping phrases or cliches to discourage challenges, inquiries, or doubts?
Does the organisation isolate members from family or friends who are not part of the group? This can sometimes be a hard one to spot as it is sometimes implied through messages that these associations are a bad influence or will drive away something “positive” e.g. spirituality or the Holy Spirit
Does it encouace an us v.s. them mentality? Are outsides deemed as dangerous, worldly, or bad associations?
Is there charismatic leadership? Are they seen as authorities who cannot be questioned and who need loyalty and obedience?
Is there pressure to conform to the group norms and not question leadership?
Do you have a fear of punishment or threats of excommunication from the group? Are there punishments for leaving or speaking out against something you disagree with?
Is there a pattern on who is being recruited into the group? Are you asked to use underhanded technics to trick people into discussions or tell lies about the religion or its history for a “greater good”?
Does the organisation cover up information that may make them look bad e.g. abuse
Are you asked to give public testimonials to express devotion and suppress doubts to the rest of the group?
If any of the above resonates with the experience you have or something you have witnessed then chances are you are looking at a high-control religion or cult. The impact of these tactics can be profound, leading to a loss of individual autonomy and sometimes causing long-term psychological harm. It's important for individuals who have left high-control religions to seek support to navigate the complex process of recovery and reintegration into society.
The Impact That This Coercive Power Can Have
The coercive power of high-control religions can have a profound and often detrimental impact on an individual's life. These groups typically employ psychological manipulation and social pressure to maintain authority and obedience, which can lead to a range of negative outcomes for members, some of which take a lot of time to recognise and deconstruct. The impact can include:
A loss of autonomy - Because so many of their choices are dictated by the group it can be hard to have a feeling of control, and feel comfortable in taking actions that would have been against the rules or norms of the group. In some of these situations, the individual is told that they need to follow leaders unquestioningly as they have the authority and know better. They can also be conditioned to feel any doubts they have as a result of their faith or beliefs not being strong enough.
Feelings of isolation - This can be a very difficult feeling to deal with, particularly when the organisation has more stringent rules on shunning or associations outside of the group. When walking away from the organisation can leave someone without a social group, or even a family unit it can also make people apprehensive of taking that step. It also can mean that making new friends or connections outside of the religion more difficult, especially if they have been told that people outside of the organisation are worldly, sinners, or bad people.
Emotional distress - When someone walks away from a high control group the thoughts and feelings they have been conditioned to have do not just disappear. They may still experience fear, guilt, and shame for actions or feelings which are perfectly normal or cause no harm to others.
Financial Exploitation - Members may be pressured to give sums of money to the group, which can lead to financial instability or ruin.
Physical and Mental Health Issues - The stress of living under constant control, along with potential neglect of medical care in favour of spiritual remedies, can lead to serious health issues. It can also link with emotional distress where the person feels like they need more faith or prayers to help themselves, and it is in fact their failing that is not causing them to get better.
Impaired Critical Thinking - The suppression of dissent and critical thought can impair an individual's ability to make decisions and think independently.
Damaged Relationships - The strain placed on relationships with those outside the group can lead to permanent rifts and a sense of loss.
The impact of these high-control tactics can be deeply damaging, and recovery from such an environment can be a long and challenging process. It's crucial for those affected to seek support and professional help to rebuild their lives and heal from the experience.
Leaving a High Control Religious Group
Leaving a high-control religious group can be a challenging and complex process, it is also something that is not always available to everyone. For anyone who is considering their options, there are some strategies which may help you cope with your situation:
Find a Support System Outside of the Group: Look for online forums or confidential helplines like the Faith to Faithless helpline launched by Humanist UK, or the peer-to-peer support offered by Recovering from Religion. Often these types of services provide more than just signposting, they can help you know that you are not alone on this journey.
You can also find some great online support communities on places like Reddit, Facebook or X. But I would always caution those who are PIMO (Physically In, Mentally Out) to take extra care as in my experience even private groups will have active group members who join to spy/report on group conversations. Make use of a false profile or anonymous postings where you can until you are ready.
Try Gradual Disengagement: If possible you can gradually reduce involvement in the group’s activities to lessen the impact of leaving.
Educate Yourself: Learn about high-control groups and the experiences of others who have been in similar situations. this knowledge can be empowering and help in finding ways to cope. I would also recommend understanding the nature of the group and the implications of leaving so that you can physically, mentally, and emotionally prepare as needed.
Develop Personal Resilience: This one can be really difficult if you are trying to do this alone, but protecting your own mental health and well-being is vital. Try to focus on ways to build personal strength, e.g. practising self-care, mindfulness, or other stress-reduction techniques.
Maintain External Contacts: If possible you should try and maintain or establish contacts outside of the group.This can help reduce feelings of isolation and provide a lifeline to the outside world.
Plan for the Future: Start planning for the future by setting goals and thinking about steps to take when leaving becomes possible. Consider the potential risks and plan for safety, including financial security and living arrangements if necessary.
Seek Professional Help: If accessible consider seeking professional counselling or therapy, especially from those who specialise in high control group dynamics (or someone who provides secular therapy).
Stay Safe: This is probably one of the most important steps of the process. Prioritise your safety and mental health over anything. If you feel unsafe please reach out to organisations which can provide help and protection.
Be Patient: Recognise that leaving a high control group is a process that may take time, and deconstruction of your old beliefs can take even longer. Be patient with yourself and acknowledge the small steps you take each day.
Links and Resources
First UK-based helpline for people leaving religions and cults – from .... https://humanists.uk/2024/02/21/humanists-uk-launches-dedicated-faith-to-faithless-helpline-for-people-leaving-religions-and-cults/.
Faith to Faithless – Humanists UK. https://humanists.uk/community/faith-to-faithless/.
Navigating Life After Leaving a High-Demand Religion: Setting ... - Medium. https://medium.com/@wise.ash.witch/navigating-life-after-leaving-a-high-demand-religion-setting-healthy-boundaries-and-finding-548e881faa24.
Cults and Mental Health | MyWellbeing. https://mywellbeing.com/therapy-101/cults-and-high-control-groups.
Learning how to live after questions, doubts, and changing beliefs is a journey. We at Recovering from Religion are intimately familiar with this path, and we are here to help you to cross that bridge. Our passion is connecting others with support, resources, community, and most of all, hope. We have two forms of support available below: peer support and professional support. https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/#rfr-welcome
A network of clients seeking therapists who use state-of-the-art, non-religious methods https://www.seculartherapy.org
How to Recognize a High-Control Church - The Glorious Table. https://theglorioustable.com/2022/03/how-to-recognize-a-high-control-church/
25 Signs you’re in a High-Control Group or Cult - Reddit. https://www.reddit.com/r/cults/comments/rov216/25_signs_youre_in_a_highcontrol_group_or_cult/
Leaving A High Demand, High Control Religion. https://www.psychotherapynetworker.org/article/leaving-high-demand-high-control-religion/
Week 1 - Understanding Cults and Coercive Control. https://internationalcultawareness.org/week-1-understanding-cults/.
How to Tell if a Group is High-Control - Cult News 101. https://www.cultnews101.com/2018/09/how-to-tell-if-group-is-high-control.html
Leaving A High Demand, High Control Religion. https://www.psychotherapynetworker.org/article/leaving-high-demand-high-control-religion/
Religious lies, conmen and coercive control: how cults corrupt our .... https://theconversation.com/religious-lies-conmen-and-coercive-control-how-cults-corrupt-our-desire-for-love-and-connection-185385
Love Bombing: What Is It And How to Protect Yourself - HealthCentral. https://www.healthcentral.com/sex-and-relationships/what-is-love-bombing.
